Feminism or Hypocrisy: Take your Pick

What exactly is Sexism? According to Wiki 'Sexism or gender discrimination is prejudice or discrimination based on a person's sex or gender. Sexist attitudes may stem from traditional stereotypes of gender roles,^[2][3] and may include the belief that a person of one sex is intrinsically superior to a person of the other.'

Recently I have come across articles and speeches demanding empowering of women. Where the women want to stand on the same pedestal as men. But lets just take a time-out. Did we men ever try to create any social awareness when we created our own platform while the ladies were probably busy elsewhere. We have never demanded anything of this society although many a times this society as demanded a lot out of us. A man is supposed to be independent and free to make his own decisions and not hang on to his mother's saree like a sissy. At the same time, not listening to his parents make him a rash and arrogant boy. 

Right from a young age the idea has been infused in our minds that boys don't cry no matter how badly hurt you are. Well girls and boys are all the same flesh and blood and yet we have to control our emotions from that age. I wonder why no woman teaches her daughter to be like us. A girl or a lady uses her tears as her best weapon to conquer the world while we guys have to earn everything.

When I was home this time my mother was describing an extremely ambitious girl she knows of. According to her, the driving force of this female is that she wants to be at par with any guy and achieve everything a guy can. How absurd is that. Have we boys ever wanted to be like you or compete with you? Why do you consider yourself inferior to us and look up to us? We have never shied away from sharing the pedestal with you. We know what we want and the only competition is with ourselves. So why not just try to get a bit of self motivation and drive youself to your goals.

A blog I read stated a line 'At some basal level men will be men'. I agree whole-heartedly. We love our cricket our football our tennis. We love playing computer games and nothing gives us an ecstasy like a gaming console. But most of us refrain from playing with a girl's heart. We know what you are and we respect you for that. We love our pals like they mean the world to us. Most guys will agree that we are ready to take a blow or two for the sake of them. Nothing can be more joyous than a guys reunion and a night-out spent getting sloshed out and recollecting old memories. Girls - Tell me honestly; can you say with a clean heart you have never envied your best friend for her designer clothes, her make-up, her good looks or her drop dead gorgeous boyfriend. Two girls can never bond the way two guys can and that's where lies your problem. If your own gender is not your friend then how do you expect to conquer the world all by yourself. 

An Fb update I recall stated something to the tune of 'Can a man and woman be looked upon at the same pedestal or is it all a magical bluff.' It probably is a bluff that was created in your own heads. A male and a female are two completely different creations of the Almighty. Both have a separate purpose in life. Both have their own equal powers at birth. It's what you do after maturity that defines a human being. Just crying out foul all over the internet doesn't solve any problems. In the words of the great M.K.Gandhi ' Be the change you want to see in this world'. So don't fight to be the same as men. Leave that to us. Be your identity and one day every one will applaud you for who you are.

We guys have never asked or been given a Men's Day to celebrate manhood. We don't need such things to prove our existence to the world. We know our place and we are proud of it. No matter what the situation, a guy is always considered to be the bread-winner at home. We never had an option like you, my dear ladies, to be a home-maker instead. He is the one who takes loans from banks and repays them all his life to get a good education, then build a good home, buy a new car and also satisfy the whims of his wife, his children, his parents leaving little or none for himself. When was the last time you heard a guy crying over all this. The answer is never. We have our own share of problems but we know how best to handle them. The social media is not the answer to them.

 If you really want to change the thinking of the society and show your standing in this world, start by eliminating the women's quota in schools colleges and work places. Why do you need reserved seats on buses and metroes or a completely reserved compartment for ladies on trains? Why don't you take a stand against these facilities that the society provided you with. If you really believe you are as strong as us, then why be afraid to share the platform? I agree that there are many mischief-mongers and anti social elements present in the society who disgrace us as men. Ministers and politicians alike who have little or no respect for women; who treat rape as a mistake by young boys. On behalf of the entire men's fraternity, I apologize for these scums of our society. But the modern day man is way more receptive to your thoughts and feelings. He would love to father a beautiful angel rather than killing her in the mother's womb. He is open to your every needs and he will do anything to earn that smile on your face. All he yearns for is your whole hearted love as a mother, a wife, a sister and a daughter. 

P.S. - I think every guy who reads this article will validate my arguments. But there will be some who will blast at me for arrogance and hypocrisy and for probably being a male chauvinist. These are the sissy's of our society who try to earn browny points from girls by being in their good books. Beware of such individuals. Maybe I'm wrong in some parts so feel free to correct me with proper justifications. This is not a personal attack against anyone but just the ramblings of a mind pained and tired of seeing the same articles over the internet. 

    

Dreams, Sacrifices, Life and Love

Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani!!! That's what is the name of the movie. It literally translates to 'This youth is crazy' and crazy it was. But wait... for those who think this is a movie review, please look some place else. This is about how it helped me rewind my own life within two and a half hours and look back at all those crazy things I did, those dreams, those aspirations, those loved ones and then how it all took a wild turn.

I am more of a dreamer than an achiever. My dreams are like a view through a kaleidoscope-plenty of
colourful pieces with barely any link with the other piece and yet a beautiful view.
I too wanna travel the world like the protagonist of the movie. I too share a passion for photography but,unlike him, I don't pursue it as a career option. Maybe I'm not too good for it to be paid or maybe I'm just too afraid to drift from the proven path of monetary inflow. Other than that, I too wanna kiss in the sunset, dance with her in the rains, climb the mountains holding her hands and live a simple uncomplicated life.

But life is never a bed of roses. The colourful pieces can never be fully achieved. To achieve one dream, you might have to sacrifice a dearer one. Life is all about compromises. But above all, life is all about living in the moment.

Look back at your life right now. Do you miss your ex-gf/bf, do you miss partying with your old friends, do you regret not having smoked a joint in college, do you regret not having a night out with your friends just to defy the rules, do you miss your parents, your family and regret having wasted that opportunity to bring a smile to their faces. Do you regret having that ugly fight with your mom and not talking to her for days. You were sure you dont need her in your life anymore coz you now lead a life of your own with your friends and she shouldn't bother either. But only when the haze of wilderness is cleared, do you realize what family really means in life. Only when you believe you have moved on, but those memories just flash in your head, do you realize that you made a mistake.

Only a simple man with barely any dreams or wants from the world, can say he has achieved whatever he ever wanted in life. Coz the more the dreams, the more the sacrifices, the more the pain. If only I could travel around the globe and capture it all with my cam, if only I could rewind my life and tell my younger immature self that betrayal hurts more than those years of love, that love maybe blind for you but not for the one you loved. That true love came in a beautiful package but you were too busy wrapping yourself up from the past that you let go of the present. That the if's and but's will only keep accumulating with every passing day. The only way out is living your life this very moment. Living your dreams like there is no tomorrow. And then at the sunset of life, you will have a much lighter baggage to carry, along with a helping hand to share it with. And the regrets of unfulfilled dreams will just faint into the darkness as you move into oblivion, but the memories live for eternity in the minds of those who had a chance to experience life with you.

Over and Out

                 We're Over... We are so Over... Just get out of my life you psycho b*^%*... 

Inner Peace... Does it always have to be so dramatic?? Why cant we see things with a calmer insight?? Because we tend to trigger the panic button too quickly. We act in the heat of the moment and not think about the repercussions it will have on the future. At the end of the day, we are just left crying over spilled milk.


  Closure... That is such a relative word. For some closure is just about meeting the next cute guy or hot chick round the corner. For some its about tearing and burning up all evidences of the past, slowly deleting all memories from the mind and eventually moving on. While for a few,well, they just cling on... That song in your playlist, those scenes from your pet movies, those infinite letters and mails and chats and gifts. They just need a hint to make them delve deep into the abyss and then make themselves feel miserable. They treasure every moment spent and recollect those lost moments when its over. The reason for a break-up could be many but the hurt they feel is known only to them.

  Who is Happy... In today's world where everything is temporary,momentary and materialistic, do you think true love does exist? People fall in love but soon enough fall out of it too. The cyber age has shown its evil face to the world.Mobiles,chatting,internet,FB,watsapp; these were supposed to connect us to the world and make it a smaller place. Make our virtual presence felt.  But it has only disconnected us from what really matters in life. It has made our real life existence pretty virtual. Today, even a toddler knows about love and a teenager has had sex. Thank you technology for enlightening our kids.

 

So friends, I believe its time we re-enter the real world. Its time we analysed our lives again. Its time we relived our dreams again. Its time we spend more time with the people that really matter.Its time we learnt to forgive. Its time we learnt to love again.  Only this time, lets make it forever. Only this time, let there be no Over and Out.

Separations, Partings and Losses in love

   When was the last time you had that strange obnoxious feeling that you were losing someone in your life! What if you were to lose someone special this very moment! But what if you had never ever imagined losing that someone special only to wake up alone one morning!!! When you are woken up by the noise of the irritating alarm and not the sweet tender voice of your beloved. When you manage to snuggle some free time in your over-hectic schedule and then realize there is no one waiting for your call anymore! The battery of your cell phone nowadays refuses to drain out, the nights find you waiting for the darkness to take over your senses rather than wait till the wee hours of the morning for the conversations to stop. When days become months and months become year but after that point, a day becomes a year.

   Love comes in each ones life in different packages and intensities. As a kid you are attached to your parents and your siblings. Despite all the sibling rivalry, you realize you cant live without each other. You protect your youngers and seek loads of gifts from your elder bro/sis. It is a bond deeper than any other bond in life. A bond written in blood, signed by the years of togetherness. A mother sacrifices a lot in bringing up a child - from his diaper days to his XL days - and does so out of sheer love for the most prized possession in her life. Hence it is the duty of the kid to reciprocate the love when he has the means to do so. You need not shower her with gifts - keep them for your girlfriends - just a loving gesture or seeking her approval before making big decisions is more than enough to melt her heart.

   But the strangest form of love comes much later in life - when you have almost lived out 20 odd years of your life - and then turns your life upside down. You start dressing up properly to seek her approval. You no longer need to be told to eat or sleep properly because you have already lost these two elements in your life. The long everlasting fights, the kiss-and-makeup, the long phone bills, the secret letters and gifts, sneeking out to meet her, feeling elated at the simplest of praises, sitting by the shore holding hands, watching movies together, promises of never ever leaving each other and then BANG!!!!! There comes the strange part.

   All these years you were leading a happy single life. All that mattered was just YOU. Two years of being in someone's arms and then you just cant get over it. Why is it that these two years leave an indelible scar for life? Why cant any other form of love ever ever compensate for those times? Why does it make you feel so hollow inside that you start questioning your being???

   This is the time for self-introspection. Was not those twenty years reason enough for living just to see your parents smile? Was not the love your sister more important than the female who never understood your love.  
No matter how hard you try, ties of blood can never be equaled by any other form of love. And no love is worth dying for if it wasnt worth living a lifetime. Love was never meant for the weak-hearted - its a challenge even for the lion-hearted. And only when you manage to rise and shine despite these losses in life will you become a true warrior. So all those who have loved and lost - once or more - never give up. Coz if those twenty years of love was not reason enough for you to live, then you had no purpose being brought to this world by them. Live for them, to bring a smile to their faces, to feel joy at their pleasures and only then will you truly understand the meaning of LOVE. And who knows - maybe your next true love is just waiting round the corner, waiting for you to find her, lift her in your arms, and walk into the golden horizon of life...

Emotions : Anger

   Consider a plush and serene relaxation and rejuvenation centre with a steam bath facility. This particular facility is used by many people daily and today is also just another day. What the operator did not realize when he closed the centre for lunch was that he had accidentally left the steam on. As time passes by the build-up of steam is huge and it has no vent to release itself. When the operator returns to face the alarming situation at hand, he first turns off the steam. But what happens when he opens the door for an outlet to the hot air inside. It gushes out and leaves the person 'scarred for life'

   Let the room represent a human body and the door - his mouth. Where does that mammoth anger get its vent? To the person who cares for it to open the door and the mouth leaves him scarred for life. We often hear about people being asked to channelize their anger. Constructive ways to let out your anger like playing a game a squash. But in practical life do we get that much time to rush over to a court and start people after having turned a blind eye to every known face in the crowd you meet on the way to stop your emotions from flowing out? Self-healing is a much better process and it is somewhat closer to channelizing it. Some ask you to breathe deeply and concentrate on your breathing so that you slowly forget the events of the past hour or so. Some listen to music and sing along or rather scream along to let it out of their systems.

   Whatever you do to vent the internal unrest is upto the individual. There is no rule as to the line of action to be adopted. But one primary rule that every man should adopt in life is - never let your 'steam' burn your loved ones. One bitter word can create a life-long crack in a relationship or even cause it to end.Because there is only so much that your friend, your partner, your wife, your relatives will take beyond which the boundaries cease to exist and the inevitable awaits.

   Life is too short. The first 18 years passes away analyzing the world and the people dwelling in it. Dont waste the next 40-odd years repenting your decisions which were made in a rough state of mind or those words uttered in a fit of a rage. The arrows which once leave the bow, never come back. The strike is fatal and the damage - irreparable. So guys-  enjoy life as it comes and learn to get a grip of yourself and your emotions even when you are facing the worst crisis of your life. It is just a test of your strength and character and you need to emerge a winner coz thats the face your loved ones live to see....The smile on your face brings the sunshine in their lives. 

Clipping the wings

   The heart is a small bird which resides inside the cage of our bodies.There are a lot of aspirations and expectations this bird has.Also it has a lot of desires.The biggest desire is to fly...fly fly fly into the blue sky...So why is it that it just happily stays in its little cage when it has the entire world waiting to welcome it with open arms.It sleeps, it eats, it chirps away merrily but deep down somewhere the desire to spread out its wings and soar above everything else is always there.But what we dont realize is that everyday in captivity, this passion of the heart slowly loses its zeal.Every passing day makes the wings go weaker and the acceptance to the present scenario - unavoidable.

   But what was it in the first place that put it in its cage? No one is born in captivity - so what put the bird in its caged.Why did this creature of the sky get chained down behind bars of steel? Will the doors to the world ever open up for her? Will the heart ever be able to fly again? Will it ever be able to accept the world as it is or move on in life believing that the cage is her only comfort zone, her quantum of solace.

   What it doesn't realize is that the world has never forgotten about her.The sky still misses seeing its favourite birdie glide.The Lord is saddened to see its beautiful creation lead a sad dejected life with all purpose forgotten.The do you know who misses you the most? The silent bird-watcher. Coz every day he waits for you to set your self free.Every day he wakes up with a prayer to see his bird heal its pain, forget its past sufferings and shake off the shackles and soar away.Coz that is where it belongs.He wants to see her open up her beautiful wings and let the rays of the sun bounce off her silky texture and make every day as bright as ever.As the bird flies away to other zones, other territories, other continents and countries- it will eventually find a new and better admirer.Someone who will take very good care of this precious bird and keep her happy with him for the rest of his life. Maybe that is why the bird refuses to open up coz its afraid that his original lover will get used to seeing it fly and when eventually has to fly away, it will just hurt him.

   Truth is - You never love to keep your love restrained.Love is unconditional and selfless...It knows no bounds, no barriers. Sometimes one look is all it takes.Sometimes even a lifetime is not enough.Love is giving your all and setting the bird free and expecting nothing in return. Just the thought of seeing you happy all your life is all he ever wanted, all he ever wished for, all he ever cared for. So set your wings in motion and fear not what will happen if you fall.Always remember that your silent admirer - your bird watcher- is always waiting to catch you if you fall in your flight.All you need to do is FLY...Fly fly fly into the blue sky, dont ask how dont ask why.Coz all I wanna see is you soaring high !!!

When I becomes WE, but I meets E

 Happiness.What is your definition of this word.For some it means money,for some it means peace of mind and again for some it means a simple monotonous but love-propelled family life.But what helps bring about that sense of happiness in your life?Can sharing your joys increase your joys and sharing your sorrows reduce them?Well this also provides the distinction between two groups of ppl- introverts and extroverts.  
   An extrovert like me just cant contain his joys and is always waitin to tell the outside world of his achievemwnts or share his sorrows.And when he finds his Miss.Right, he cant stop telling everything about his day.He feels it a moral duty to keep his partner informed about his feelings and emotions and may be his past.But thats where trouble erupts... 
   Coz when he pours his heart out to his beloved, he expects the same in return.But what do you do when the hubby is an introvert and is reluctant to open up to him?Initially when love is young, things remain fine but with the passage of time, his expectations of an outspoken girl still lies unfulfilled.Its not that he can stop sharing his life as a vengence coz he is used to being heard and sympathized or appreciated as the situation may demand.But even though he accepts her emotional silence, there will be times when it can get irritating for both.And either one can take an adverse step in a fit of rage and scar both of them as well as the beauty of the relationship.Both feel they are right in their own personal ways and this slowly eats its way into the apple of love like a worm.   I guess the only way to make it work is by accepting each other as they are.This is easier said than done as love has two different meanings for them.The test of time as usual plays its role and only the survivors can live happily ever after.I guess you have to make your love age like rare wine, and not like milk which just turns sour and bitter with every passing day...Life is too short to be wasted fighting over triflings.Go out and live it like a champ, quit cribbing and show your unconditional love in a way even your princess didnt expect...Only then will you get the essence of the word HAPPINESS...